Just to remind you how mindblowingly awesome I am
Greetings mortals,
I’m going to make this as painless as possible. This here’s to tell you I had an unbelievably insane time at Web18, but before that you have to know how ultra-cool you guys have been and how much Aditya Mehta respects that.
The day I announced to people around that I was going to quit this job, they looked at me like I had asked to be injected with HIV. The day I emailed my resignation they looked at me like it was my birthday. And now, till I walk out of this place, never to return, they’ll look at me like I have cancer. Every time I crack one of my crap jokes, they look at me like I’m laughing for one of the last few times and sigh as if to say, “Soon he’ll be gone.” I’m not passing away, y’know? Sorry, here’s some toilet paper … blow thy nose.
So, I’ve grown used to telling people on the phone and at events I’m “Aditya from Buzz18 and in.com” or “Aditya from in.com and Buzz18” depending on what makes me sound more important at the time.
Man, did I feel like a hotshot critic or what, praising great stuff and trashing rubbish, being welcomed at events and mooching the booze and starters and what not. Mazaa aa gaya, baap.
Before I launch into hysterical sobbing and ejaculating over the long list of people I love from this organisation, allow me to brag about what I think is my best work with Buzz18.
I’m totally proud of my reviews of Metallica’s Death Magnetic and Guns N’ Roses’ Chinese Democracy. They’ve been my heroes since I was very young, and I felt victorious getting to write about their comeback albums. The music of Dasvidaniya was the first in a long time from the Hindi film industry to blow me away, so writing about that was fun. Writing about Chhoti Si Baat as a DVD Recco felt really good. I was exhilarated when our boss gave me the go-ahead to write how I felt about Ram Gopal Varma and his Satya.
Without further ado, the thank-you list!
Bryce Desa (for not running away or hitting me), Karen (lovely girl), Bindi Mehta (for the food and conversations), Dhwani, Nicky, Shamit, Suresh and Kartika.
Elda, Khristina and everyone else who put up with my lame humour!!
Ankush Sohoni (I’m not grateful anymore; he turned out to be a sneaky “beta male” bastard), Siddharth Bhatia – great fun, fellas! Arjun Chatterjee, Rajat Dev – it’s been cool having you’ll around. Thank you everyone I’ve smoked tobacco or other things with, everyone who smokes cigarettes in patli galli (Deepti, haha!). The HTML guys, Systems, Kunal & SFF – double thumbs up! Everyone at Web18 – whether we’ve spoken or not, I’ll remember your faces! My new friends Soumya Sahadevan and Tarini Menezes!
Zeus Unwalla!!! Being around Zeus is a study in alpha male behaviour! I received a free lesson in manliness every time I interacted with him! Zeus, thank you for making my work at in.com breezy and fun!
My people at Buzz18!!! Reuben, Shweta, Sundari, Dhruv, Johnny (rock star of Web18), Sriradha, Anjana (psychobabble at music events)!
Abhishek Mande and Anand Vaishnav – the BEST film critics in the city, I’m a fan of your U/A series!
My hot favourites – Jaya & Suranjana – the toxic twins, the poison pair… nothing can separate you except a weekly off. I love you girls!
And now, the three women directly responsible for my having been in Buzz18, who have always encouraged my writing but have made no bones about their dislike of my showering gaali-garoch on unsuspecting celebs.
My mother Rupa – Thanks for getting me into reading, mom! No more angsty stuff, I promise!
My girlfriend Nikishka – Thanks for always shaking me out of my comfort zone, babe! No more angsty stuff, I promise! (Ex-girlfriend now, I’m not that grateful.)
My boss Chandrima Pal – Thank you for sharpening my writing skills, and thank you for putting me onto more challenging stuff. Right from writing balanced reviews and the importance of being unbiased to the art of crushing without using foul language, I have learned every thing from you, boss! No more angsty stuff, I promise!
That’s it, my beloved poseurs, lest you start weeping buckets like I’m dying or some shit like that. Don’t forget me, or I’ll kick your ass all the way back to Matunga Road. Okay, that’s enough… buzz right off!
Yours,
Aditya from Buzz18 and in.com 😉
Coming soon… Still Buzz In’
Send your hate to : mehtallica@gmail.com
ASS-RIVETING DISCLAIMER: The author knows all his friends, colleagues and soon to be ex-employers agree with him for a change. He also expects a hero’s farewell, with gun shots and all that.
(Parting shot from my Buzz18 blog “Lashkar-E-Shaitan”)