Archive for August, 2010
How To Quit Eating Meat
Every once in a blue moon comes a film that reinstalls my faith in Indian cinema, a film that tells a story without boorish subplots, bad acting and embarrassing attempts at humour. Based on a true story, Antardwand has come at the right time, when movies are being made mostly for the purpose of making the filmmaker and the already overpaid actors (sorry, I meant superstars) richer, irrespective of how poor the film may be.
Raghuvir (Raj Singh Chaudhury), who studies in Delhi, wants to marry his pregnant girlfriend, and comes home to a village in Bihar to inform his mother and seek his father’s permission. The father (Vinay Pathak, superb) has other plans; he has already found a suitable bride for his only son and is busy turning down other offers. He pooh-poohs Raghuvir’s wish, and the angry son leaves for Delhi early next morning.
But Raghuvir doesn’t reach Delhi; he gets abducted by Akhilendra Singh’s goons and is confined in a small house temporarily, where he is beaten up and tortured in other ways at regular intervals till he agrees to marry Akhilendra Singh’s daughter.
Are you shocked? You better be. This isn’t a funny movie, it’s dead serious. Raghuvir is forced to get drunk on local liquor on his wedding night, which he fumbles through in the stupor. Refusing to accept Akhilendra Singh’s daughter Janki as his wife, he remains upset and makes his young bride miserable. Heavily pressurized to consummate the marriage, Raghuvir gets very drunk one night…
Antardwand does not seek to entertain; it is a drama that will leave you stunned. Antardwand is one of those rare films in which the script and actors do complete justice to each other. It is not a commercial movie, but it isn’t even a boring artsy flick; it may not have a point to make but it has a great story to tell.
VERDICT
At last, some real cinema… and really good cinema.
RATING: 4/5
My Swimming Student
By Janak Samtani
Restaurant Review: Bostan
Bostan means “The Orchard” and is the name of a Moghlai restaurant in Jogeshwari West on SV Road. I’m guessing it has been named after the book by the famous Persian poet Saadi, as there used to be a restaurant called Gulistan (“The Rose Garden”, another book by Saadi) on SV Road in Santa Cruz. Bostan has a cult following thanks to its Butter Chicken and Tandoori Chicken (which isn’t always good) and is no place for vegetarians.
Mutton Soup @ Bostan
The first thing you have to have at Bostan is the Mutton Soup, which has lots of garlic and ginger and strips of mutton. This nutritious soup will open up passages you didn’t know existed. Avoid the biryani and pulav; the rice dishes used to be great but not a lot of effort goes into preparing them these days.
Stick to the gravies and you can’t go wrong. I heartily recommend Mutton Green Masala (it’s boneless) and of course, Butter Chicken. The butter chicken here is red (and not orange like at most other eateries) and finger-licking delicious. I’ll go as far to say it’s the best butter chicken I’ve had. Also, don’t miss their chai after your meal. The old menu had some absurd rules like “do not play transistor”, “do not comb”, “do not flurte [sic] with companion”, and “do not sit for long time.” The last one means you have to leave in 15-20 minutes irrespective of whether your food has arrived or not. Kidding. Go to Bostan.
YUM YUM: Paratha and Butter Chicken @Bostan
Andheri East has got itself a neat place in the form of Spirit Kitchen & Bar. It’s where you go when you want to sit around drinking for a long time and want to eat reasonably priced food. Families sit downstairs in the brighter section; upstairs is a not so lit but snazzy section where groups of young people get drunk.
This place has a lot of food: Punjabi, Mughlai, Chinese and Thai, but how the food turns out depends entirely on your luck (or the chef’s mood), for I’ve been overjoyed with the starters/main course here a few times (the chooza kabab!) and disappointed a few. For a change, I don’t mind taking the gamble because there is so much food to check out. And Spirit Kitchen & Bar is a great place to drink alcohol at for people of all ages.
Beer Review: Stud Premium Lager
With that name and a taste that could make a guy give up drinking, Stud Premium Lager is a brew entitled more than any other beer to be called ‘horse piss.’ Available only in certain regions of Maharashtra, and this stuff actually sells quite a bit out there.
Food Review: Punjabi Rasoi
Chicken Lal Pari
This tiny restaurant near Natural Ice Cream in Juhu serves really tasty Punjabi dishes. Just go for any non-vegetarian gravy with naans/parathas/rotis because the biryanis and vegetarian food are not that good. Still have to try the fish and prawns here, but the chicken and mutton dishes are excellent and the portions are large. Punjabi Rasoi has only five tables, doesn’t serve alcohol and is open till midnight.
Aditya’s Movie Recco: Gerry
There may be other movies that are pointless but Gerry is the film that remains stuck in my head close to a year after I saw it. Gus Van Sant takes you to Death Valley for the first blow from his “Death Trilogy”, and the landscapes are fascinating to keep looking at for some time. And time is what Gus Van Sant takes to tell the real life story of two best friends who go hiking without food and water and get lost. No amount of retracing their steps gets them anywhere, and the two, both called Gerry, tired and dehydrated, start getting increasingly irritated with each other. Matt Damon and Casey Affleck play the two Gerrys, and they’ve also written the screenplay (along with GVS, I think).
The two things you need to watch Gerry are patience and the desire to watch something truly unique – a story that doesn’t have a point to make, threatens to bore the hell out of you, and yet keeps you hooked till the end with the curiosity to know the outcome. The two Gerrys walk, talk and then walk some more. The dialogue is minimal… general talk, often humorous, but more importantly, they keep walking. Gerry will make you curse Gus Van Sant and pull your hair out in frustration but it will also make you admire the guy for making you do all that and wait till the end to know what the end is. The final walk was so engrossing that I absent-mindedly rolled a joint with something that wasn’t rolling paper and can’t be smoked. Sorry about that, Demonos.
RATING: 4/5
The Quoted Tongue #7
I dedicate this song to Priyanka Chopra!
– before launching into “Tandoori Chick” at Independence Deathfest 2010
Peepli Live is a fucking bore of a movie with a bit of decent entertainment thrown in. It probably satisfies Aamir Khan because he had something to do with a social issue in Gujarat and generally likes to make films that are of social relevance. Here he gives a chance to Anusha Rizvi to make a drag of a movie that is a good in some parts, the middle-of-the-road stuff is especially good, as is the hitting out at the media which RGV will be happy to watch.
The best thing about Peepli Live is that it has Raghuvir Yadav, one of the best and most unknown Indian actors. Raghuvir Yadav is outstanding as Budhia, but you fags will obviously find Natha “endearing”. Lord Satan, how I hate that word. Endearing, I think, is used only for ugly or fat people. Sometimes ugly people who are fat, which means they should be behind bars.
Now this Natha is an ugly (but not fat) dumbfuck who doesn’t even react to all the shit happening around him. Now don’t ask me what shit because you should’ve read reviews in the newspapers, which would let you know we are so deprived of quality cinema that critics actually give good reviews to mindless trash like Once Upon A Time In Mumbai, so-so attempts like Tere Bin Laden, and absolute garbage like ATKJ? and Houseful. And now this.
Getting back to Natha, he is an ugly bitch but the director wants plenty of close-ups of his mug just to make idiots like you find him “endearing”. There are some goats near my house, you might find them endearing too. Fuck off with this gay shit. I don’t give a fuck about farmers anywhere and neither do you, so stick to ‘liking’ important-sounding causes on Facebook, okay? Because Aamir Khan’s “socially relevant” films are as effective as you lot signing petitions for causes you don’t give a fuck about or even remember the next day. Even Taare Zameen Par isn’t something I want to watch ever again.
And then there are politicians shown discussing shit you don’t need to know; do you really care what their plan of action is? And that dude who was unhappy about being in the media because it doesn’t really help people or causes and just reports stuff and moves on to the next big piece of news? Yeah, just like this movie which doesn’t do anything for farmers, entertains for a brief period, drags on for way too long; it’s a two-hour movie which seems like it’s three hours long. I felt so happy when that chap died in a bomb blast. Yay.
What am I trying to say here? That Peepli Live is a strictly okay attempt; offbeat cinema shoved into the mainstream because of Aamir Khan’s backing. Subtlety and quality filmmaking have gone for a toss; Peepli Live is noteworthy satire diluted by everything modern-day filmmakers think are necessary ingredients to make a film work. How wrong they are. Peepli Live is not the best film of the year, and neither is it quality cinema. It’s a good idea poorly executed.
RATING: 2.5/5
Mehta Kya Kehta? 