Beer Snobbery 1

Stale Beer Makes For Unhappy Hours

Restobars that serve a pitcher of draught beer free on one on a regular basis have been serving stale beer. The people who realize something’s wrong with the beer (it’s not flat) are convinced by the waiter, who stirs the beer with a fork to produce bubbles, that the beer isn’t flat. In less than three seconds, the drink goes dead again because it’s very stale.

At such places (that have the 1+1 free scheme), the best thing to do during happy hours is have liquor. Also, try sticking to your usual brand of whisky because unless you’re a whisky expert, you won’t know what they’ve given you after the second scotch.

Vijay Mallya still doesn’t know that the best beer to come out of United Breweries is London Pilsner.

What every beer lover in Mumbai should do is run to Living Liquidz and sample the beers reviewed on this blog. There are stouts, ales and lagers and they taste nothing like our local beer. It’ll be a while before pubs and restaurants start thinking beyond Heineken and Corona and Indian lagers, but we have Living Liquidz (and all its outlets) in Bombay!

Overheard at a wine shop: Ek Keengfeeser dilade… nahin toh Foe-shtur pilade!

 

Worst Draught Beer You Can Drink

Drunk In Denial @ Koli Seafood Festival '09

Without a doubt, the worst draught beer available is the kind you get at restaurants like Pop Tate’s, Red Box, Fuel, Jughead’s and every other place which serves those one-on-one-free mugs/pitchers. There’s a bloody good reason places like Alfredo’s (Juhu) and Temptation (Bandra) and a lot of cool bars you know don’t have these one-on-one-free schemes.

Royal Challenge is a good beer but their draught, if not flat, is horribly screwed up in some other way. You might’ve had several pitchers of beer and been wasted but RC’s draught will fuck you up in some crazily twisted way. And the worst thing is these sick places serve you this “draught beer” chilled, hoping you won’t notice and will guzzle it down without complaining because there’s a free one coming up.

As much as I love draught beer and free stuff, I’ve returned pitchers to the Pop Tate’s staff and have complained to the management (in different branches across Mumbai). Managers at most of these places either have nothing to say in the beer’s defence or simply state that’s the way the beer is and that no one else complains. Since I don’t break glass on people’s heads anymore, I ask for bottled stuff and get back to the evening.

This is what happens when one man (Vijay Mallya) monopolizes the alcohol scene in the country and this is why we should promote deserving foreign brands by consuming more of their booze. Balls to Foster’s, by the way.

Looking forward to small breweries springing up and giving the thirsty people of this nation an actual choice. Remember one thing – there’s no such thing as free beer. Don’t believe me? Have some free pitchers at one of the places blacklisted above and see.

Beer Reviews:

Little Devils

Kingfisher Ultra